You IDIOT!!

One day, when I was about 16, my little brother John was painting a little plastic toy car on the brand new coffee table my dad just bought. My Dad entered the room and said quite calmly:

"John, don't do that. You're gonna spill paint and wreck the new coffee table.

John kept painting. Ten minutes later Dad returned.

"John -- I'm telling you -- you're gonna spill that paint and wreck the new coffee table."

John moaned:

"Uuuuuuhhhhg pffffft -- no I'm not. I'm not an IDIOT!"

The rest of the kids watched John continue to paint out of the corners of our eyes as we watched cartoons. Everyone took their turn reminding John that he was in fact an idiot and was going to spill the paint --- like an idiot.

Ten minutes later -------------------- like an idiot, --- John spilled the paint.

All the other kids, myself included, now unloaded on John, completely justified in calling him Stupid and Idiot and Faggot and Dumb Piece of Crap....

Dad walked in with a glass of water.

Silence filled the room. We all waited for the glorious show that would hopefully highlight just to what degree John was in fact a total and complete IDIOT.

Dad placed the glass of water on the brand new paint covered coffee table.

The silence was deafening.

Dad says:

"Hmmmmppfff, well I'll be.... -- I was wrong, ------- table still works. Lay off John you guys."

Annnnnd that was how my Dad maintained hero status amongst his children.

John cleaned every single smidge of paint off the table without being asked.

My dad is no idiot.

The End

On Halloween, I went to a goth party dressed as the dude who beats the shit out of fags and goths. I talked like Willy Jo the whole night -- I was amongst a billion zombies and vampires and yet I was easily the scariest dude in the room. I could smell the pee. Goth's don't have a sense of humor, I guess that's why they are goths.

Before I go -- Click HERE to see the scandalous photos not suitable for a family friendly blog such as this.

That's all for now!
Don't get caught beating yourself up when you fuck up even after having been warned in front of everyone many times!
Your Favorite Country Music Legend Who Really Loves His Dad,
merkley???